I Hate Kind Girls

juz exchanging greetings with them will get them into your mind
start texting each other your heart will be set a flower
if they call you , you're done for
Enjoy staring the logs and smilling like a fool
However , i wont get fooled again 
That is what your kind call kindness
If you are nice to me, then you are nice to other people
I always end up nearly forgetting them
Reality is cruel
I'm sure lies are a form of kindness
Thus , i say kindness itself was also a lie
I always end up with this expectation
and i always end up these misunderstanding
and before i knew it , i stopped hoping
A highly-trained loner is once bitten , twiced shy
As a veteran of life, i've gotten used to losing
thats why I'll always.....hate nice girls

Blue

The seagull
wonder if she is sad
left alone without being touched
by the blue of the sea
or the blue of the sky
Air composes this eternal sky.
Water comprises the endless sea.
 My lifetime wish is to turn into a white bird
forever drifting between those two.
Losing nothing. Never forgetting anything precious.
Only being myself.
Forever remaining myself.
Forever untouched by anyone else.
The only way to make it true
is to be alone."

DIPME =

well as u can see, i enrolled, or else u could say as a sacrifice by my parents into the DIP-ME course ( mechanical engineering course ) , before this i thought wanna join IT since i have more knowledge and interest in IT or computer programming , but oh well, already chosen , cant do anything to alter it - -

after a few months, met a few quite interesting friend ,and totally off contact to my previous friend..I dont mind either , they have their own way to go and i don't like people to trying to be nice in front of someone but backstabbing them..Now , if my friend have their own opinion, they speak out straight in front of you, which was the attitude i like.. * frowning*

try to smoke once,,,
hmm...not bad
im don't wanna try to be lenient again...
its tiring...

maybe will quit smoking if a gf request LOL...
IF.... OK ?
IF...cuz im not in that league (smirking)

Monday final exam, im praying so that foundation maths could pass,
of cuz, really work hard to get B...HOPEFULLY
i dont wanna pay rm660 to retake .
rm660 cost alot , and i could buy a new headphones with it man= =*LOL*

new bass, though its a novice one = = still OK for me since im not that good

The day before yesterday, i saw a rabbit
Yesterday, i saw a deer,
and today, you

The Beginning

Just give me a reason 

To keep my heart beating 

Don’t worry it’s safe right here in my arms 

As the world falls apart around us 

All we can do is hold on, hold on 

Take my hand 

And bring me back 

I risk everything if it’s for you 

I whisper into the night 

Telling me it’s not my time and don’t give up 

I’ve never stood up before this time 

Demo yuzurenai mono itta kono te wo hanasanai 

So stand up, stand up (Just gotta keep on running) 

Wake up, wake up (Just tell me how I can) 

Never give up 

Kuru wa shimi hodo setsunai 

Just tell me why baby 

They might call me crazy 

For saying I’d fight until there is no more 

Fureri wo fukunda senkougankou wa kankakiteki shoudou 

Blinded, I can’t see the end 

So where do I begin? 

Say another word, I can't hear you 

The silence between us 

Nanimo nai you ni utsuteru dake 

I take this chance that I make you mine 

Tada kakusenai mono kattate yori misekakete 

So stand up, stand up (Just gotta keep on running) 

Wake up, wake up (Just tell me how I can) 

Never give up 

Kanashimi to setsunasa 

Just give me a reason 

To keep my heart beating 

Don’t worry it’s safe right here in my arms 

Kudaketenaide saite jita kono omoi wa 

So blinded I can’t see the end 

Look how far we made it 

The pain i can’t escape it 

Kono mamajya mada owarase koto wa dekinai deshou 

Nando kutabarisou demo kuchi hateyou tomo owariwanaisa 

So where do I begin? 

Nigirishimeta ushinawanu youni to 

Te wo hirogereba koboreochisou de 

Ushinau mono nado nakatta hibino dasei wo sutete…kimi wo 

Just tell me why baby 

They might call me crazy 

For saying I’d fight until there is no more 

Fureri ukanda senkougankou wa kangakiteki shoudou 

Blinded, I can’t see the end 

Look how far we made it 

The pain i can’t escape it 

Kono mamajya mada owaraseru koto wa dekinai deshou 

Nando kutabarisou demo kuchi hateyou tomo owariwanaisa 

It finally begins.. 

歴史ある古典部の真実 , 氷菓 " Hyouka ", Ice Cream , I Scream わたし は 叫ぶ

In Showa 42 (1967) , Kamiyama high school administrator decided to cut short the cultural fair from 5 days to 3 days . This causes the unsatisfied from the Kamiyama's student and they started a student movement in order to preserve the privilege of their extended cultural fair , but pathetically no one was dare to stand up against the teacher because they were scare of the punishment .

To maintain the student movement , a demonstrations were organized by an unknown student . Sadly what happened next was that Sekitani Jun, also as Chitanda's uncle, was made the leader of this student movement although it was against his wishes ( believed as used him as a sacrifice to sucess the demonstrations ) , drawing the shortest straw. 


With the figurehead, the demonstrations become more violent, and one of the school building got torched. Of course , the movement was successful to a degree and Sekitani was lauded for his efforts, but he himself was expelled a few months later for reasons that were lost to the modern club members. Sekitani Jun received all the punishment for it. He received the punishment for a position he did not desire, nor did he earn. 


In becoming the ' kind hero " of their high school's lore , Sekitani Jun was bestowed with an immortality that he did not wish for and lived with a punishment that tortured him until his disappearance in India. In carrying the half-hearted thanks and praise of a student body that used and disposed of him , he nurtured a growing bitterness and resentment. This coalesced into a grudge that he could never express through words. To make sure he pass down the feelings and anger he left behind , he used the only way he knew how to : through the name of his club's anthology...




氷菓 " Hyouka "...


After Sekitani Jun got expelled , apparently Kanya Festival is a wordplay for Sekitani Festival 
(  Kanji for Sekitani 関谷 also can be re-read as Kanya ). So the Kamiyama High Cultural 
Festival was actually unofficially called Kanya Festival as a tribute to the "hero'' that was sacrificed, Sekitani Jun 


Because Sekitani Jun was sacrificed unwilling , so Kanya Festival is a taboo to Classical Club which he was in before got expelled

Why Sekitani Jun used Hyouka as the title for the anthology in order to pass down his anger that he left behind ?
" 氷菓 " Hyouka , a Japanese character which means ice cream in English . A sweet and icy nice dessert for all of us , but do it really means Ice Cream ? 
No , Hyouka it doesn't really suited the title of this anthology , it just a lame pun for Ice Cream 
what feelings u have when u got yourself a cone of ice cream ? Sweet , Cold and nice feelings will came across, 
But in Sekitani Jun's case, it is totally in a different meaning.
A translation for a "lame pun"


"Hyouka"


"Ice Cream"


"I Scream"


( わたし は 叫ぶ ) 
In romanized : watashi wa sakebu


During Chitanda's childhood, she ask her uncle why he name the anthology as Hyouka .
After hearing his uncle explanation , she cried sadly because of the fear of being alive, but dead.
this causes the shock to Chitanda and after the shock , she doesn't quite remember what is the catalyst for her tears. 


After Houtarou ( protagonist ) solved the mystery , she finally remember what his uncle told her, 
Sekitani Jun told his niece ,Chitanda that she must be strong at all costs because there maybe a moment she cant even scream . She'll wish to cry out, but cant , like a voiceless rabbit got bitten by a canine, unable to ask for help , unable to scream , unable to cry , the only way to free itself is to fight back fruitlessly . No difference between live and death, sad and joy..She will be alive , but dead. 

Catalyst for her tears was what her uncle said

Her uncle got expelled

Her uncle got chosen as sacrifice

Demonstration held in Kamiyama

Demonstrations for more violence

                                                           Anthology " Hyouka "
                                               Canine was the educational adminstrator
                                                        rabbit was the student body
                                     and the only rabbit who fights with the canine was Sekitani Jun
                                                                  the Sacrifice

There is a moment u cant even scream 

this causes Chitanda to cry towards the fear of being alive, but dead

                                                      Translation for Hyouka
                                                            Ice Cream
                                                           I SCREAM